Funny Birthday Poems 70th



Welcome to the congratulations and amusing webpage of Funny Birthday Poems 70th for the attainment of 3 score years and 10. These are free for non commercial useage.










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Age is not measured by years. Nature does not equally
distribute energy. Some people are born old and tired
while others are going strong at seventy.
Dorothy Thompson
WELL DONE YOU!

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For I have passed three-score and ten
And I can count upon my fingers
The years I hope to bide with men,
(Though by God’s grace one often lingers.)
So in the summers left to me,
Because I’m blest beyond my merit,
I hope with gratitude and glee
To sparkle with the birthday spirit.

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Talk about getting old. I was getting dressed and
a peeping tom looked in the window, took a look and
pulled down the shade.
Joan Rivers

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You are never too old to set another goal or to dream
a new dream.
C S Lewis

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You have everything now you had twenty years ago
except now it’s all lower.

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May you live to be 100 and may the last voice you hear
be mine.
Frank Sinatra

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The first forty years of life give us the text;
the next thirty supply the commentary on it.
Arthur Schopenhauer

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In dog years, I'm dead.

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Old Age Tension

Sometimes it’s nice being old
It isn’t the mess you’ve been told
You can turn on the telly
Eat custard and jelly
And stop in the house when it gets cold
You can go to the coast for your tea
And sit there and look at the sea
And think of that failure
You had in Australia
With that sailor when you were 23.
You can try on a big daft hat
Or fiddle about with your cat
Or stand on your head before going to bed
But we wont say a lot about that!
You can pretend to do what your told
When people are starting to scold
But all the time it’s yourself that you please
‘Til they want to replace your hips and your knees.
Ann Dryden

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It used to be wine, women and song...
now it's beer, the old lady and TV !!

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Funny Birthday Poems 70th